the irony of the treacherous traverse

Every time we get a big snow storm in Park City, Parley’s canyon on interstate 80 turns into a writhing beast of vehicular activity.  It is quite a comical event.

Tractor trailers, in their vain gamble to avoid having to stop and put snow chains on their tires, will inevitably be wiggling all over three or four lanes of traffic like any number of earth worms after a heavy summer rain.  These highway behemoths flail around in slow motion as their drive wheels fail to gain traction. So much for saving time…

And despite the overhead signs warning drivers to only navigate the canyon if they have four wheel drive or chains, many foolish people will make the attempt with front wheel drive, rear wheel drive, and poor tires. Which brings up a huge irony – what good will four wheel drive do for anyone without snow tires? Four wheel drive with out good tires is just four wheel slide.  Is UDOT giving drivers unmerited assurance to climb the canyon in severe weather – is this some of sick joke?

It is hilarious what you see happening to all of these courageous travelers. Cars slid out facing every direction on the compass. Cars fifty feet off in the median trying to muscle their way way back on to the slippery pavement. Cars stopped in every lane. Cars weaving around struggling or abandoned cars. Big cars being towed by little cars. Little cars being towed by big cars. One little car going up. Two little cars going down.   Go cars go.

The most comical thing I’ve seen is a nervous wife white knuckling and bent over the poor steering wheel of a front wheel drive car, wheels spinning, snow spitting, and the husband walking behind pushing the car.  And this happening on the last two mile stretch of the very steep East bound section of the canyon.  And they were somehow making headway.  I couldn’t help but roll my window down as I passed them and holler, “That’s different!”.

The real irony of my most recent treacherous traverse is that I was driving a rented Cadillac Escalade from California for an unnamed company connected with the Sundance Film Festival. I was returning from an airport drop and had no idea whether this expensive, luxury Mormon mover had four wheel drive or the type of tires that could get the job done.  The real irony is that I was one of those intrepid idiots trying to conquer this icy incline.

As it turns out the tires were quite decent and all four wheels were driving.